I choose…

We were at the lift. Waiting. Not speaking. Just facing each other, staring without purpose, searching yet not probing.

I looked at her; those eyes, those lips, the jaw line, the hair… everything, I drank it all in and felt like I was choking on how overwhelming it was. The world around us seemed to have ceased, even the sound of silence had become muted. Her eyes were moist, mine were hard. Both were unblinking. If this was to be the last time, then this moment would be etched into the very fabric of my mind. My injured right knee was cramping. I did not flinch. I thought about what was going on inside her mind; an outside would have said she was putting on a commendable brave face, yet I saw it all. She was scared, she was bruised, she was on the verge of giving up, yet her heartbeat still pounded for she was a believer even in the most dire situations. But I didn’t understand what was going on inside me. Where there should have been a raging conflict, there was a bliss filled calm. A few meters away, behind a closed door, another person sat waiting for me, for our future, yet I paid them no heed now.

The silence was shattered by the soft sound of the approaching lift. We blinked. It was catastrophic. A tsunami erupted and we were swept away. The lift doors opened just as I opened my mouth to tell her. But the cord had been snapped, the energy had been drained. She blinked again, she understood. The pain was felt by us both, which only worsened it. I blinked.

She was gone.


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